ERP 051: How To Thrive With ADHD In Your Relationship
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Melissa Orlov is the author of two award-winning books – The ADHD Effect on Marriage (2010) and The Couple’s Guide to Thriving with ADHD (2014, with Nancie Kohlenberger). She is considered one of the foremost authorities on ADHD and relationships – counseling ADHD-affected couples, and teaching marriage professionals about effective marriage therapy for couples impacted by ADHD. Orlov runs a very popular and effective 8-week phone seminar for couples, and blogs at www.adhdmarriage.com.
(These are Show Notes: Be sure to listen to the episode to hear stories, examples, and more tips.)
Melissa Orlov talks with us about the impact of ADHD on marriage and romantic relationships. She describes the common signs and clues of ADHD and how it manifests within intimate relationships. She explains the predictable patterns that couples go through and where couples get stuck in unhealthy dynamics.
“ADHD is misnamed. It is not about attention deficit. It is actually about attention dysregulation.”
Melissa offers insight into her work of helping couples shift out of these negative patterns so that they can work together more effectively and positively. She also emphasizes the importance of managing the ADHD symptoms in a healthy way.
She shared three main points to her work:
1, Gaining awareness and education about ADHD.
2. Working hard to let go of problematic relationship patterns and create new relationship interactions and patterns that are more productive and positive.
3. Being compassionate and empathetic to your partner.
Melissa encourages people to view learning about an ADHD diagnosis as a good thing. She shares that between 70-90% of adults with ADHD can significantly improve the management of their ADHD symptoms with the right treatment.
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If you are interested in developing new skills to overcome relationship challenges, please consider taking the Empowered Relationship Course or doing relationship coaching work with me.